I gave it much thought before deciding to pen this entry.
It's about my family and I'm expecting it to get lengthy so, well... I'll leave it to your decision to go about reading it (as it always has been).
Know that I am not expecting any sympathy, let alone understanding.
I am here to blog for the sake of blogging through and through, and nothing more.
The thing people don't realise about living with not one, but a whole bunch of mentally-impaired people is that it's not as easy as it seems.
Your entire life changes.
I recall back during my secondary five Superteen's programme, the whole lot of us guys were chatting about the ridiculous glass-smashing stunt Mr. Ernest Wong pulled to bring everyone to tears.
We were asking each other if we would be sad if our parents died, or if there was anyone in this world that we would despair over upon their death.
I remember clearly that my answer was a no.
A no which bore certainty in the word per se.
I don't say stupid things like this to make myself sound cool or anything like that.
In my family, I posseses little to none respect at all.
Pertaining to this issue, I am brazen enough to admit that I did nothing to deserve any.
Derserving something is one thing.
Whether you wish you to be deserved something is another.
To me, respect in this household is of as much worth as the dirt on my soles.
I'm just the sort of person who's a sore eye to everyone in the household, yet one who portrays etiquette in public.
Which is a true thing, anyway.
Most of the time at home, I don't reply anyone who speak to me.
Not when they ask a bunch of retarded questions.
But then again that would've to depend on the individual's perspective of 'retarded'.
To them, I'm a lot of things - irresponsible, selfish and someone with a serious attitude-problem.
Guess I won't deny that.
I can soil an area by snacking on chips (you know where the crisps scatter all over the floor) and not give a damn about it.
Here's what I have to say.
Believe it or not, I am quite a imperturbable person (even if I don't show it most of the time).
I don't get why people overreact to minor stuff like that.
And YES, soiling an area with chip crisps IS MINOR to me.
As is an exploding television set or... well I don't know.
Things like that appear so minor to me that I don't even regard myself as irresponsible, as warped as it sounds.
I'm on a completely different wavelength of mentality with the rest of my family, it seems.
I have never once thought myself to be an intelligent person.
But I am brazen enough to say that I easily find the people around me to be stupid.
In fact, there's so much stupidity revolving around MY life that the very thought itself is annoying.
If I were to rate my family's intelligence on a scale of one to ten, I'd give them a two.
It is that bad (from my viewpoint).
I'm being nonchalant about the way they act not because I am silently admitting my errs (well at least they see it as one) , or that am I letting them have their way for the fact that they're my parents.
It's just that when you attempt to reason with a bunch of dumb people, it makes you look just as dumb.
I refuse to partake in any of any such nonsense with mentally regressed people.
And know that I do not fault them for not being able to think the way I do.
They didn't send me to school to change me into a smart person to have me turn my back on them.
Know that while I do not blame them, I have no intentions of condoning with their antics either.
Then there's my younger cousin.
I'm not trying to flame him behind his back on my blog or the like - let's just say... he's as typical as any singaporean or asian to get all fired up when encountered with bluntness.
Now let's see... why the hell would I want to go up to him and say all these things, when he's only able to understand at most a quarter of what I've sermonized and have him yelling insults at me?
That's not a very wise choice, I would say.
My cousin.
I don't particularly hate him, but if anything he's not much of a subtle person - the one thing I loathe about him.
Parents tend to compare me with him because we're like oh-so-similar on various aspects and the fact that we grew up together since birth.
(Yeah I've got to reiterate this even though I've done it like a thousand times for the benefit of the ignorant, as fucking annoying as it is - I live with all my cousins under the same roof).
He's the complete opposite of what I am.
He's the hardworking guy, the sociable one in the family, the 'responsible' (well with accord to the logic of my family anyway) guy, the one who doesn't spend his money extravagantly like I do, blah, blah and blah.
I don't suppose it would be hard for me to be like him.
I can change my character into this thrifty, hardworking 'thing' almost effortlessly and please my family just as well.
I can be favoured.
WOW.
Sorry to break it to you, that ain't happening.
I could go on for days if I don't end this entry now.
This entire entry is merely a miniscule fraction of my entire family profile.
Not that anyone's gonna bother about MY affairs, so like yeah.
